4 years ago, I was one lost chick. Where was Marcie? Why was I behaving, reacting and annoyed by so many things. Oh let’s drink and eat to discuss all these things – that will make me feel amazing – wahhhwahhh:(
I would build up all this emotion and let it come out in the wrong way holy Drunk City and Hangover Lane – can SUCK IT now – that solves nothing but allowing me to misbehave and avoid. I self-sabotaged myself, by not doing, or being true to me. I felt I was standing in a place, that I didn’t belong. I was not fulfilling my goals, my dreams, I was living someone else’s, some that society said and some I learned. Not saying bad or good, but I allowed too many little heads to run through mine that I mind-f***ed myself. I felt paralyzed.
I was thinking about my changes for WAY too long, I stopped myself due to “I need a steady income”, “I need insurance”, “I want to travel”, “I need to pay bills”, etc. Well, guess what, I took a leave (2010-2011), went back for 2 years ( thought my new head space would be better but it was 2 too many) and resigned last year from education. I’m 10x happier than 4 years ago, even 6 years ago when I really was contemplating a change. Listen to you!!
Being a part of a huge health movement with Beachbody filled with positivity, inspirational stories, fitness, health…I had never been more supported or around so many awesome happy go-getter, true under-dog to inspiration in my life and I will forever be changed for the better. I chose Turbo Fire/Shakeology/healthier habits and the rest is a continual work in progress, a vast learning of myself through personal development, goal setting, being more awake and aware, crushing goals, setting new goals, struggling at times, but never forgetting how far I have come. BE PROUD!
I don’t even recognize that girl from 4 years ago, I knew when I fully committed to me and a healthier lifestyle on April 11, 2011, that I was shedding not only fat and negativity, but I was honoring myself and where I was at the time, I promised myself I would not return to that girl. She is a part of me but she represented a shell of who I am, my protector, but it wasn’t the true me.
After years of being up and down since childhood in weight, being made-fun of (rude – you don’t know my story nor do I yours), making poor choices in eating and relationships…I lifted the fog and rebooted ME. What an amazing f***ing feeling it is!!! I’m tearing up thinking of how far I have come, some really harsh moments I had to face and still do at times but to be right here living my BEST SELF ever is my hard work of crushing goals I set and keep setting.
To think 4 years ago I was crying in my room wanting out of everything – pack bags hop a plane to some little island and be gone. Instead I faced ME, found ME again and have continued to learn and grow stronger. These past 3 years have brought me to new beginnings and so many opportunities, all I see is nowhere to go but up Up UP!! Am I earning as much, NO. Am I projected to earn way more than I was, YES and it is happening:)!! Am I happy, full of love and awesomeness that I want to give and share with ALL, HELL YES!
Cheers to being true to you and living a healthy, fit and fun life!! xo
**Thank you for reading – I know was long but wow did that feel good to share:)**
YOU are not alone!! We are all in this together!!